Teen Talk

My mother used to say that character is most revealed by how one deals with adversity.  I thought about this adage as I viewed how friends, classmates, and parents dealt with the culmination of the college admissions process.
When a friend was rejected at her dream school, her father called the admissions office and angrily demanded to speak to the idiot in charge.  Another friend’s mom cried throughout spring break and refused to come out of their posh hotel room.  Whether she was disappointed for herself or her son is questionable, as is her decision to have children in the first place.
  It was the toughest admissions season ever, but most students I know ended up being admitted somewhere, if not their first choice.  And interestingly, most kids are adapting and accepting their future at the options they’ve been given. 
  I myself am wait-listed at my favorite school.  Some people I know in this position are flying in to meet deans of admissions and offering lavish gifts.  It’s a tough economy, and I can’t fault the school if they take the bait.  I also can’t compete by offering a Picasso or a science wing.  But I have several good schools from which to choose and I know I’ll be okay.  Actually, I know I’ll be more than okay.  I will thrive, because that’s who I am.
  When I was younger, I can remember asking my mother to tell me the story again about how her parents first met.  I just loved hearing about Barbara Lichter’s sweet sixteen and how my grandmother wrote in her diary:  “Jackie Coe is so cute but wears white bucks.  Ick.â€
My grandparents grew up in the same neighborhood in New York City and always seemed so in love.  I once asked my mom if they hadn’t met at the birthday party did she believe they were fated to meet elsewhere.  I was surprised and disappointed by her response.  She no longer believed that there was just one person in the world who was one’s true love.  I’m a romantic and I want to believe that somewhere the boy I am going to marry is walking around, and when he’s not thinking about sex or baseball, is wondering when and where we will meet.  How could my mother say something so blasphemous?
But I thought about her beliefs a lot as the college decisions came in.  Maybe if there is not just one perfect mate for each person in the world, there is also not just one perfect school. 
I have a dear friend who is vowing to transfer to the university that just rejected her.  When her wound is less raw, I plan to tell her about my grandparents.